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How long, Lord? How long?

How long, Lord? Will you utterly forget me?
How long will you hide your face from me? (Psalm 13:2)
It’s been days, weeks and months living in sorrow
under the constant shadow of a pandemic
that makes us sick, that isolates us, that scares us, that takes our lives.
Captive at home during this confinement,
away from my beloved ones,
watching my dearest ones falling sick.

How long must I carry sorrow in my soul,
grief in my heart day after day? (13:3a)
I fear getting ill and being forever absent to my children.
I fear, even more, my parents getting ill while I am unable to run to their aid.

How long will my enemy triumph over me? (13:3b)
How much longer shall we live in isolation?
When will I be able to embrace my friend?
When will I be able to see someone approaching
without feeling scared?

Look upon me, answer me, Lord, my God!
Give light to my eyes lest I sleep in death. (13:4)
Yes, I know my final destiny is in heaven.
Yet, in this sacred life you have given me,
I have duties to fulfill to those I love,
to those who depend on me the most.

Lest my enemy say, “I have prevailed,”
lest my foes rejoice at my downfall. (13:5)
That enemy who throws at me
arrows of sorrow, uncertainty, angst and fear.
That enemy who chases me with its poisonous sting
to raise high its crown by seeing me fall.
That foe of mine who is present in my daily life,
forcing me, selfishly and irresponsibly,
to do things that put me at risk,
abusing his authority and moved by his selfish will.

How long, Lord? How long?
Listen now to my sorrowful cry.
Extend your powerful right hand
and appease the storm that shakes these waters.
With your voice that splinters the cedars of Lebanon,
command this disease to go away and harm us no more.

Even amid this tribulation that seems meaningless,
despite my fears and despite myself,
with great confidence, as always, I come to you.
For I trust in your mercy.
Grant my heart joy in your salvation. (13:6a)
This heart that always trusts in yours.
For I know that your providential hand
is moved by your infinite mercy.
More than once I have experienced your unmeasurable love.

Tough is this trial I am going through.
Long are the days and the weeks, everlasting.
But I know that if you allow this trial in your infinite mystery,
it is for my benefit and for the benefit of my brothers and sisters.

Grant me, therefore, patience and serenity to endure until the end.
Grant me wisdom to discern your will.
Grant me fortitude to convert myself to you,
so this arduous trial is not in vain.
Grant me humility to accept always your holy will.
Allow me, once again, to sit with my brothers and sisters at your Son’s table,
and nourish myself with his body and his blood in his blessed banquet.

Then, I will be able to proclaim,
I will sing to the Lord,
for he has dealt bountifully with me! (13:6b)


Be passionate about our faith!

Northwest Catholic - October 2020

Mauricio I. Pérez, a member of St. Monica Parish on Mercer Island, is a Catholic journalist. His website is www.seminans.org.

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